Friday, 21 July 2017

if I would, could you?


What I felt about Chester Bennington's suicide, is this.

Everybody makes mistakes, everybody had some sort of "past", every men you knew or never bothered, had and lived through their own Troubles.

I have friends who died at young age, some friends still struggling with addiction, jobs, life and whatever hell life has placed them. Some have moved on, on their own unique path.

Some achieved success, some saw faraway places. Some still begging in their prayers.

That's why I hate trolls, the norms of this generation.

They like to laugh on other's shittiness.

The truth is, most men I knew, try to walk as upright as they could,  with their Troubles in their back laying silent.

Some tripped, snapped and made decisions they could not revert.

I don't think most guys of the younger generations knew this, it seems to them whining is normal. And laughing at other's shit is normal.

It should be reminded, people have round shoulders for bearing heavy loads.

Alice In Chains - Would

Know me broken by my master
Teach thee on child of love hereafter

Into the flood again
Same old trip it was back then
So I made a big mistake
Try to see it once my way

Drifting body it's sole desertion
Flying not yet quite the notion

Into the flood again
Same old trip it was back then
So I made a big mistake
Try to see it once my way

Into the flood again
Same old trip it was back then
So I made a big mistake
Try to see it once my way

Am I wrong?
Have I run too far to get home?
Have I gone?
And left you here alone?

Am I wrong?
Have I run too far to get home?
Have I gone?

And left you here alone?

Saturday, 15 July 2017

to lie dormant is certain death

a MIG-21.
Source : Facebook page Russian Aircraft 
https://www.facebook.com/groups/589984121087488/

firdaus 9898

There is few guys with the ID firdaus 9898 which is not me nor have anything to do with this blog.

https://www.facebook.com/firdaus9898/
https://www.instagram.com/firdaus9898/
https://twitter.com/mfirdaus9898

And somehow, with these happening, I felt lazy to update this blog, to spend time and effort for this blog, only to find other people just register things under the same name, and you can't do much shit of it because of internet neutrality and this is a goddam free world where everyone reserve their right for free speech and free to express themselves in whatever way they felt comfortable with.

But to delete this blog, I will not, simply because, everytime I got online, this blog will be a homepage for me to start surfing.

Anyhow, life's is ephemeral, and there will come a time when my physical body dies and God knows what happens to this blog.


world most epic handshake


Watching this video, only reminds me of recent Mahathir-Anwar relationship. (Malaysian shit politics)


other video which tickles my funny bones




positive tone in life


Read the comments section of this video, the funniest comment there is this.

"I was biking to school with this song on, and when it finished i won the tour de france."

Now I realised why most bloggers who are good in drawing characters, comics, sketches, seldom update their blog nowadays.

It's just not worth it.

People will just take it away and claim as theirs. Worse, they might abuse it and make it shameful.


"If you have a skill, if you have a talent, if you have experience doing something, never give it away for free. You should always charge and you should not be afraid of charging. Because, quite simply, number one, obviously, if you give something away for free you won’t make any money off of it. But number two, if you give something away for free, people won’t appreciate it as much."


And so this is a perfect song for this blog at this moment.


Auld Lang Syne is Scottish for "old long since".

The singing lyrics is this,

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and old lang syne?

Anyhow you can go wikipedia the song and the lyrics.





Monday, 10 July 2017

echoes / effortless

Eilif Peterssen - Summer Night, 1886
Source : Wikipedia

Echoes

And so last week, I felt, was a week full of chicken noises.

Monday, a relative of mine, suddenly went berserk with his own religious interpretation of things, which I deemed insane, as  per entry http://firdaus-9898.blogspot.my/2017/07/small-talk.html

Then there was this issue of Shell girl.
Followed b this issue of a Muslim girl with her dog. http://www.themalaysianinsight.com/s/6767/

As usual,  everybody started shrieking like little chickens.
Including an online friend of mine. 

A lady.

As usual, she started bashing males all over for being stupid. When I commented, she told me I was being apologist, then I told her, I'm against stupidity, but hell, don't over-generalise all men..and somehow I felt tired of explaining things

 Then the second issue blew up, and she went into rocket-firing mode. She started bashing JAKIM, her logic is Quran comes first before Hadith, and Hadith is something that is...does not need to be followed?...only Quran is obligatory...and so forth. Since Quran does not forbid dogs, so why must we follow Hadith.... <== her logic.

From the time I started knew her, she was Anti-Hadith of some sort, hence this time, I knew well, that explaining things will only tire me, so I just kept quiet.

And I quietly removed her from the friendlist, and blocked her.

Why so harsh?

Last week, I was cruising the road with my small motorcycle while listening to Joe Satriani's Surfing With The Alien (mp3 player).

The sun was setting down, the orange brightness and the nearby gloominess nearing darkness.

It was then, I was captivated by this track "Echo", the last song from that album.

from Surfing With The Alien, 1987

After maghrib prayer at nearby musolla, I drove my motorcycle to a "romantic sight" nearby my house for a little time with myself, around 8pm or so.

I looked at the sky above, with the stars, planets and their moons, and God knows what and how much up there,

all glitters, and somehow, a thought came to my mind,

hey look at all those glitters, those are big mega things, and yet they moved around,
those big things, with their big issues and big agendas,
all moved silently 
in a space where there's no sound,
where those lights might light years behind,
and those beautiful lights might just be echoes.

While I'm here, in my small planet, where most people are noisy and rocket-driven, shouting and screaming to get their points across,
they might resort to bombing cities so that some leaders might agree,
and yet,

those big things up there move in silence and echoed in lights.

And so that's why I just kept quiet, blocked her FB from mine, as if our lines no longer intertwines,

and you know,
one day one of us might die and we all will stop communicating too,
so why not?

Suddenly I feel at ease, and remembered those who do stop communicating with me, for whatever reason there is,

I no longer blame you, and I now understand the feeling.

Whatever happened, as those things that is happening, will sometime in the future to come, 

be memories, and just echoes.



Still Another Day: XVII/Men

The truth is in the prologue.
Death to the romantic fool,
to the expert in solitary confinement,

I'm the same as the teacher from Colombia,
the rotarian from Philadelphia,
the merchant from Paysandu who save his silver to come here.

We all arrive by different streets,
by unequal languages,
at Silence.

by Pablo Neruda


from Surfing With The Alien, 1987





Eilif Peterssen - Under Salmesangen (In the Church) (1878)

Effortless

I learned this "effortless" thing from  my wife, my sister-in-law and some female friends who are into elegant fashion, and the trend in the "tudung" / scarf fashion now is the Neelofa scarf.



And so, the catch here is, beauty itself is not a stand-alone quality, for beauty to become "elegant", it has to become "effortless".

The "effortless beauty", or so to speak, the element here is actually on being "natural", trying not too hard to look beautiful, the beauty has to be somewhat effortless.

If you type in Google "Effortless beauty", you can see for yourself.

Effortless is portrayed as a positive adjective, and it is cool to "look" effortless even though the action itself is hard to do.

For example, every soccer fans "wooohs" and "waaahs" over a cool flick at the ball by a player, a basketball player look cool when he tried to score that unbelievable 3 pointer, being effortless never cease to amaze and wonder people.

Eilif Peterssen - Lake Fishing, 1889
Source : Wikipedia

I remembered a story, told by my senior when I worked together with him in a shopping mall project.

There was a time in the company, where there were two senior engineers, that was about to be promoted to project manager, my senior and another guy.

Most site personnel seldom reports to office, they usually do it weekly and maybe once-a-month (to collect paycheck hehe). But there was this slight difference between this other guy and that senior of mine.

That senior of mine, was always "quiet" whenever he came back, he just smiled and had his cool persona, light heart jokes with colleagues, and then whatever discussion needed to be done, will be held personally 1-to-1, if it is with boss, they'll smoke outside and chat, or tea-time, 
if it is with the accounts or HR, then keep it brief and simple...

The other guy, I was told, always came back to office with a "drama". Meetings will be held, there will be an "aura" in the office signalling his attendance, he'll be busy with stuff, printing this and that.

Even though the other guy looked busy and productive, my senior was the one promoted. 

In this working life, not only you have to deliver, but you have to look "effortless" in delivering the results, if you want to go to the managerial level and above.

That's why, my senior explains, why most of his friends in construction, sleeps 3-4 hours daily in their homes, because they are busy preparing things for work. Never stay up late in office, hide your effort, deliver your results "effortless" ly.

The problem with generation nowadays in reading this, maybe, they emphasized too much on the style and look and not on the result. This is stupid, like wearing a cool blue necktie without wearing any shirt ie. naked.

“Rushing into action, you fail. 
Trying to grasp things, you lose them. 
Forcing a project to completion, you ruin what was almost ripe.”

- Lao Tzu 

from the 1998 Crystal Planet album (my first Joe Satriani album)



Tuesday, 4 July 2017

Heritage Tourism Malaysia | Balai Seri Andika


This video is a project from UITM students, 
my cousin is the interviewer in this project.

This entry is to promote their video.

Monday, 3 July 2017

small talk


Gustave Courbet - Snow Effect, 1860
Source : Wikipedia

Last Saturday, my wife and I went to my auntie's house for Raya celebrations.
My mom was there too.

It was a joyous occasion, we were happy, and we took photos of the warm moments.

There's a photo of myself, my wife and my mother standing proud and happy, which I shared in my FB.

But, stupidly, I made a mistake of sharing it to someone dearest in Whatsapp.

I felt angry by his remarks.

But then I remembered I've written this in my blog.

'A man, I feel, is a shit asshole if he have these two shitty qualities at the same time.


1. Hot-tempered
2. Talkative'


As a man, don't talk when you're pissed off.  The quality of words will be shameful.

I tried to ignore but my heart felt fire.

So I read something online, and I searched Poemhunter (www.poemhunter.com), I found some nice poems.

Don't Go Far Off

Don't go far off, not even for a day, because --
because -- I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?

by Pablo Neruda



Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die

by Mary Elizabeth Frye

Somehow I taken by my imagination while reading Pablo Neruda's "Don't Go Far Off", I drawn a picture in my head, of the KTM Komuter station, empty, silent, but someone alone waiting there.

And these words sprinkled out from the imagination.

"You might wait for a that train, asleep, for it will somehow rise back into action, for none of us could wait for lost time, for it will be long gone, whether you wait or not.

Hence, with that in mind, I wrote this sloppy thing in Malay and shared it in my FB.


Aku tadi dimarah orang

aku tadi dimarah orang
kerana gambar ini, mahu berperang
dikutuk aku di waktu petang
bagaikan aku berlaku sumbang

secara sinis aku diberitahu
dilontar pada ku pendapat berbuku buku
gambar2 ni sia2 lagi maudhu'
perbuatan tak berlandaskan tasawuf

aku beritahu, jangan marah2
gambar diambil di saat meriah
kenangan waktu ber-ramah tamah
mungkin anak aku nanti buat folio Sejarah

namun hati orang keras tak sudah
di Whatsapp nya aku gambar habuk sampah
"nah! jadikan lah pula ini hikmah"
kata2 sinis lagi menyampah

aku diam lagi membatu
baru kini sebabnya aku tahu
mengapa ISIS mengebom batu
di tempat sejarah dan di tempat sujud

bukankah dunia terlalu letih
banyak bising perkara remeh
banyak kecoh perkara leceh
banyak melayan drama sedih

semua orang kan berlalu pergi
semua orang kan berlalu mati
gambar ni menjadi bukti
hidup aku, pernah gembira dan disayangi

kita hidup sambil menanti
tapi saat pergi takkan kembali
aku kongsi untuk memori
untuk saat senyum senyum sendiri.

-sendiri sendiri 3 July 2017

Anyhow I want to end this on a light note.
So this is a Malay funny video on poetry.

Gado-Gado Sudut Puisi

(Update 9:58[m 3 July 2017 : I deleted the FB entry just now at 9:58pm. Quite a number of people "liked" it, but I don't want people to share and viral it, as there's a photo of myself, my wife and my mom.)

Friday, 30 June 2017

courage equal to desire

Young Girl Reading - Jean-Baptiste-Camille Corot, 1868
A. Facebook 

I un-friended a lot of people on FB, usually those whom are interesting for me to follow, either their comics, words, opinions, etc.

I've come to a time, when I am now married with family, hence, privacy is something I treasure.
And so, in FB, I only "friended" those whom I knew well in real life, and felt secure with, with me sharing things I like
Nevertheless, I still follow those people, either by me clicking "follow" button or I typed their name in the FB "search".
A lot of family and baby photos of relatives and loved ones, whom I think, there's no need for others except those who I am comfortable with.

I also set my account to "Private".

The reason is easy. Some people might have idea that I commented on their pages so that I can make my FB account, or this blog famous.

I don't.

And I felt comfortable, that I can share whether I liked, personal or not, interesting or bored to death, whatever, to those whom really knew me personally.

I don't want to get pleased by people whom I don't know, it felt like prostitution.



To A Friend Whose Work Has Come To Nothing
 Now all the truth is out,
Be secret and take defeat

From any brazen throat,
For how can you compete,
 

Being honour bred, with one
Who, were it proved he lies,
Were neither shamed in his own
Nor in his neighbours' eyes?


Bred to a harder thing
Than Triumph, turn away
And like a laughing string
Whereon mad fingers play
 

Amid a place of stone,
Be secret and exult,
Because of all things known
That is most difficult.


by Willam Butler Yeats

B. Courage equal to desire 

Those who possessed The Cranberries most famous album, No Need To Argue (the Zombie album), will surely know there's one song entitled Yeat's Grave.

And only this morning, after I found boredom after what I read in FB, that I'm bothered to find the William Butler Yeats poem "No Second Troy" which were read by Dolores during the middle of the song.

No Second Troy

Why should I blame her that she filled my days,
With misery, or that she would of late
Have taught to ignorant men most violent ways,
Or hurled the little streets upon the great,
Had they but courage equal to desire?


What could have made her peaceful with a mind
That nobleness made simple as a fire,
With beauty like a tightened bow, a kind
That is not natural in an age like this,
Being high and solitary and most stern?


Why, what could she have done, being what she is?
Was there another Troy for her to burn?


by William Butler Yeats
published in 1916 in WB Yeats poetry collection entitled "Responsibilities and Other Poems".

I don't want to tell you the story behind WB Yeats and Maud Gonne, you can google it and learn yourself the story behind it, I guarantee you it is one of the most interesting broken love stories. 

A bit of golden spoon-feeding though, as per below links.

Silenced by death in the grave
William Butler Yeats couldn't save
Why did you stand here ?
Were you sickened in time?
But I know by now
Why did you sit here?

In the GRAVE

(then proceeds reading W.B. Yeats "No Second Troy"

Why should I blame her
That she filled my days
With misery or that she would of late
Have taught to ignorant men violent ways
Or hurled the little street upon the great
Had they but courage
Equal to desire

Sad that Maud Gonne couldn't stay
But she had Mac Bride anyway
And you sit here with me
On the isle Inisfree
And your writing down everything

But I know by now
Why did you sit here
In a grave ...

Why should I blame her
Had they but courage equal to desire



C. Facebook and some love story
I felt that sometimes, those people whom I followed, with their huge following, sometimes try too hard that it felt stale.

But then, life teaches that, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything then.

Anyhow, a guy that I followed, always repeats the story of being rejected by girls or so.

I felt bored, so somehow I googled Chairil Anwar (Chairil was famous for making poetry to lots of girls)


TAK SEPADAN
Aku kira:
Beginilah nanti jadinya
Kau kawin, beranak dan berbahagia
Sedang aku mengembara serupa Ahasveros
Dikutuk-sumpahi Eros
Aku merangkaki dinding buta
Tak satu juga pintu terbuka
Jadi baik juga kita padami
Unggunan api ini
Karena kau tidak ‘kan apa-apa
Aku terpanggang tinggal rangka
Februari 1943
Source : http://was-was.com/2013/12/kumpulan-puisi-chairil-anwar-lengkap.html
KENANGAN
untuk Karinah Moordjono

Kadang
Di antara jeriji itu-itu saja
Mereksmi memberi warna
Benda usang dilupa
Ah! Tercebar rasanya diri
Membumbung tinggi atas kini
Sejenak
Saja. Halus rapuh ini jalinan kenang
Hancur hilang belum dipegang
Terhentak
Kembali di itu-itu saja
Jiwa bertanya: Dari buah
Hidup kan banyakan jatuh ke tanah?
Menyelubung nyesak penyesalan pernah menyia-nyia


19 April 1943
Source : https://spoilaaa.wordpress.com/2014/12/01/13-puisi-chairil-anwar-untuk-10-wanita/



 D. Facebook content which are more interesting


http://www.komikhk.com/2017/01/juara-wira-softcopy.html
(Juara Wira full set dari 01 ke 121 (end)




Jengking Merah comic 01
https://www.facebook.com/pg/LegasiManhuaMalaysia/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1149787401794399


Jengking Merah comic 02
https://www.facebook.com/pg/LegasiManhuaMalaysia/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1160678944038578

Jengking Merah comic 03
https://www.facebook.com/pg/LegasiManhuaMalaysia/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1174167306023075

Jengking Merah comic 04
 https://www.facebook.com/pg/LegasiManhuaMalaysia/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1186111961495276
 
Jengking Merah comic 05
 https://www.facebook.com/pg/LegasiManhuaMalaysia/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1196964353743370


 That's all. Happy reading.

 

Wednesday, 28 June 2017

sprinkled with emotion

Continuing from previous entry
http://firdaus-9898.blogspot.my/2017/06/mind-your-own-business-part-2.html


I found two beautiful videos, short animation that won Academy Awards for Best Animation for 2017 and 2016.

Winner for Academy Awards for Best Animation for 2017 


Winner for Academy Awards for Best Animation for 2016
It was inspired by the director's grandfather, who was imprisoned during 1973 Chilean coup d' etat, and spent his life living in exile from 1975 to 1990.

Both videos touched my heart, I think did shed tiny tears after watching each animation.

Simple yet emotive, powerful, beautiful.

Mind your own business Part 2


Continuing from previous post :-

C. Steamy Raya

Eugene Delacroix - Shipwreck on the Coast, 1862
Source : Wikipedia

And so this Raya, my wife and I went to Melaka, to my parent-in-laws village family annual Raya gathering at Bukit Rambai, the house of my mother-in-law's mom.

My sister-in-law, the mother of Sabrina and Chayra, car-pool with us, her husband didn't join us, with parent in law in their own car.

But, the catch in the story is that, my wife and I booked a hotel for two nights, somewhere around Jonker Walk, while my sister-in-law with her two kids stayed at another hotel somewhere around Klebang beach.

Hence, when we arrived, I was bombarded with question and daring looks from the relatives :- Why stayed in the Hotel when we can be here together? It supposed to be a gathering right?

My mother-in-law also punished me in front of the relatives but somehow I managed to keep quiet with my dumb look smile.

My wife's and sister-in-law's reason, is similar:- The house is quite steamily hot. 

But they kept quiet about it when questioned.

On Raya eve, around 8pm, I received a Whatsapp from wife to quietly go to the car.

Earlier, I saw my sister-in-law playing fire-crackers with Sabrina outside the house, when my mother-in-law suddenly excused herself from the relatives to go out to buy pampers for baby Chayra. 

When I arrived, I saw my wife were actually in the car with air conditions turned on, with Chayra, already in the baby car seat prepared.

Ceh! They already planned to get out from the house for a while, in secret, to go to nearest Ice-Cream Ice Bowl shop in Melacca town. Father-in-law was not involved as we will go with only 1 car.

And as the five of us go to our ice-cream getaway, my mother-in-law said "oh god your nenek (grand-ma)'s house is very very very hot".

This is the shop, I went to Kota Laksamana branch, Melaka
Source : http://nineteencapri.blogspot.my/2016/04/food-review-big-bowl-ice-batu-berendam.html

Somehow along the way, and at the Icecream shop, I learnt few family stories/gossips.

It was said that, every Raya at Grandma's house, something will get stolen/missing. And they actually identified the person who did it.

Wife and sister-in-law also shared that they hated some relatives due to their bossy attitude.

When they were young, wife and sister in laws was always criticised as lazy and sloppy by this special boss, while being scolded to do Raya house chores, ie. cleaning dishes, cooking.

They paid my ice-cream as well, probably as either bribe or drivers fee.

Anyhow, every family have their own dark secret and shit stories.

I think the good lesson in this, it is always best to stay in a hotel or lodge whenever we are on a visit to relatives house.

You minimise the conflicts, the bad stale stories and cursed emotions, and if something is missing, there's no finger-pointing.

Hey isn't Hari Raya supposed to be a well-intended vacation?.



I think this is a good practice also to keep a satisfactory level of privacy with your family.

Sometimes, you can see cousins and in-laws in their casualness but not quite appropriate. And you and your family might have your un-appropriate moments too. 

Some people might barged in to rooms of their relatives house, and some un-easiness might arise.

And as usual, as families, I felt, familiarity breeds contempt.

There is no reason of not helping with the cooking of dishes, cleaning dishes, plan it earlier, or just cook it earlier. Sometimes people might criticise, as usual, but at least you sweat during preparation before coming, rather than after seeing them, which might make their shitty opinion less painful.


This year's visit is extra special, as each time we returned to our hotel, we cleaned ourselves and rested while waiting for the traffic to subside (oh it was terrible traffic during Raya in Melaka town), then we went out, my wife and I only, enjoying our romantic getaway at Klebang Beach after having our dinner.

 
(this video is here to let you imagine how it feels walking with your loved ones at a beach)



D. Waves of the un-necessary talk

Eugene Delacroix - Christ on the Sea of Galilee, 1854
Source : Wikipedia

A man, I feel, is a shit asshole if he have these two shitty qualities at the same time.

1. Hot-tempered
2. Talkative

I have both occuring at the same time, until I learned my lessons well, which enable me to properly court my wife to marriage. And you are a shitty worker or manager if you have those two things at the same time.

This is because this two element involve self-control, and in real life struggles, you might feel being pushed and end up being "hot", but actually, for me, a man should at least be less talkative.

At least being less talkative has its own macho qualities, you can ask numerous disappointed girls out-there on how shitty they felt after admiring a hot guy, only to find out he's an absolute fool after he opened his crappy mouth.

My brother and my mom, whom in this blog, I always mentioned about them being conflict, well....their recent conflict kinda change my perception.

Now I just felt like they are like Neelofa and Fattah Amin. They do "feel" towards one another. As Neelofa ran away when Fazura is around. There is a play of emotions and feelings.

And when you are deeply in love with someone, you want to be close, and you will end up hurting each other. You feel down, hope and tears, then somehow after some days of not speaking and felt a terrible pain of missing each other, they end up embrace each other in their  own sweet ways.

And the best part of it, the cycle continues.

Previously, I treat these as "chronic melancolic" problems, nowadays I just "cheh" / "meh", hey its a lovers quarrel.

The recent incident was idiotically simple.

Since I already declared I'm going to Melacca, so mom want to spend time with bro, at least a day before Raya (since she knew he won't be in her house at Raya day, as "Neelofa" and "Fazura" cannot stand being in the same room)...so she planned at least, she asked my bro's help to go together to Pasar Kajang for Hari Raya groceries preparation.

My brother asked a stupid question. "Whose money is being used to buy the meat?"

And my mother shouldn't answer that question that shouldn't be asked. It was "Fazura"'s money.

And so "Neelofa" felt pissed off and said not to even touch the dishes "Fattah Amin" (my mother) prepared. And of course a mother would feel hurt by those remarks
 
Eugene Delacroix - The Lion Chase, 1855
Source : Wikipedia


Un-necessary hurting. Un-necessary questions. Un-necessary answers.
But then, that's what lovers do, I guess.

 
Eugene Delacroix - A Young Tiger Playing with its Mother, 1830-31
Source : Wikipedia



[Prechorus:]
We'll try to stay blind
To the hope and fear outside
Hey child, stay wilder than the wind
And blow me into cry

[Chorus:]
Who do you need, who do you love
When you come undone?
Who do you need, who do you love
When you come undone?





Mind your own business Part 1


1. Vulgar

Eugene Delacroix - The Death of Sardanapalus, 1844
Source : Wikipedia 

The above painting might be vulgar to you, so I ask for forgiveness.

Eugene Delacroix based it on the story of King Sardanapalus, which is summarised as the self indulgent king, nearing to his defeat, went to prepare to burn himself  (funeral pyre), with all his belongings, including his eunuchs and concubines too, killing them first before they are burnt together, with him.

Recently, there was a viral story, about a smoker who smokes at a restaurant, then a lady with her kid inside a stroller, giving a damned look to the smoker, signalling for him to stop smoking, only to be ignored. 

Someone took photo of the incident and viralling the issue. Apparently, it was told that the one who viralled it, told the smoking guy to stop, only for the guy to ignore.

For me, by looking at the public shaming and comments in the social media, everybody is a genius about the issue of smoking, And so they are right.

But then, I would like to ask you about privacy. Was it right to viral the thing online? Didn't the viral does not respect the guy, when the viral itself asks for people to respect with common sense?

We might not know, the guy looked disturbed while looking at the phone, hence the reason for ignoring when somebody "asked" him to stop smoking. We might not know how the smoking guy was told, maybe he was being jeered, hence the angry ignoring response...we don't know.

But then, people, a lot of people, give comments as if the guy deserved to be smoked in hell. As if they are pure innocent angels whom doesn't commit any misforgiving.

Listen, my point here is not the smoking. I'm talking, on what right does the guy have to viral it out in the web?

I did comment on this on someone's page, but then I deleted it. Why? Because I read this.


..........People who are unable to mind their own business are most likely internally miserable. They seek to find faults within others just to make themselves feel better. Offering insight to a friend whose present situation seems distressed can be helpful at times but there is only so much advice you can give without pushing the limits. Even if you don't agree with what someone else is doing sometimes, you need to take a backseat and let them make their own mistakes.
“Everyone has faults and there is a fine line in helping someone get through their indiscretions and chastising them for it. It's easier said than done for people to help each other rather than hurt, because some people might not even be aware that they are simply being a pain in the rear end versus being helpful.”.............
..................If you are not friends with a person and he or she does not personally know you, then do not make the mistake of letting his or her opinions and attitudes persuade you. These types of people thrive for attention and live for chaos. They tend to lead boring lives and have no excitement in their own, so they act in this manner to create something out of nothing. They seek to fill the gap in their lives by discussing the lives of others by judging them harshly, so that they can feel better about their own miserable existences.
“What I choose to do with my life is my choice and not yours, and what choices I decide to make is mine and mine only, and who I associate myself with is my decision and it's none of your business.”...............
...........................People are too quick to judge other people's shortcomings, but are reluctant to look internally and evaluate their own. Some people really just have nothing better to do than to gossip about others. They just seek to cause trouble because they thrive on drama. These people need to get a reality check and realize that this is an immature way to go about life.

If any situation doesn't involve you, instead of getting in the middle or putting your two cents in, you should mind your own business. If a situation concerns you or you have experienced something of a similar nature, then it's time to stand up and to talk.

And stupidly, I found this at a forum which I love dearly https://forum.lowyat.net/topic/4341501/

Aiyoh why so kepochi over petty issue?

the meaning of kepochi should you been wondering what the hell is it?
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080219100934AAXgLlK 





B. Politicians will never admit 

Eugène Delacroix - Liberty leading the People, 1830
Source : Wikipedia
On Raya night, an ex-minister made a statement, which for me, sounds stupid for that minister's level.
As usual, people bash him, including a mufti, some Islamic politicians, and most Muslim, since it was Raya, people are a bit emotive when people start questioning and make an issue out of "praying".
Today, that ex-minister gave a counter reply.
Actually, I kinda expected Zaid Ibrahim to reply like this. Deny and say the other side is wrong.

I believe that all politician somehow possess this "Deny, never admit" when they made some screw-ups, whether management, stupid statement, etc.

I learnt this from the 2010 series, depiction of Three Kingdoms.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CIM5PnKuWA&t=1805s


You forward to Minute 11:37 and watch the whole thing to understand.

If you are highly ambitious, and want to go into politics, in the Asian world at least, and yet on some shitty day you made a screw up;

The first idea is to deny all the way.

The second idea is to accuse other fellas.

In Zaid Ibrahim's case, he denied that his statement is wrong, it was "misinterpreted".

The "accuse" tactic = he highlighted Nik Abduh, as if the whole thing is a defensive reply from Nik Abduh "scathing" remarks.

The same idea in FGV case, ie. Isa Samad. Denied the wrongdoings, then ask the CEO to take leave (indirect accusation).

Ambitious politician are like this, at least in the Asian world, I guess, but I might be wrong.

Screwups and excuses


He's bad to the bone, ain't you, Tyrone?

Of course I am.

Tyrone'll drive for us. He's done a rally driving course.

Of course I have.
I don't want that dog dribbling on my seats.

Your seats?
Tyrone, this is a stolen car, mate.

While I'm at the wheel, it's my car...
...so stop that dog dribbling on my seats. All right?

I can't believe you found it. Where'd it go?

It went back to the gyppos.

Shut up. And how could it find them?

Well, I don't know. I'm not a dog, Sol.
Ask him.
It's like he's a fucking homing beacon.

Steady on the brakes.
I thought you said he could drive, Sol.

Don't worry about me. Just worry about that dog on my seats.
All right?

What?

You said he was a getaway driver. What the fuck can he get away from?

Don't worry about Tyrone. He can move when he has to.
Worry about getting us a gun.
What's that?

This is a shotgun, Sol.
It's a fucking anti-aircraft gun, Vincent.

I want to raise pulses, don't I? - You'll raise hell, never mind pulses.

That does not look like a bookies.

Why'd we stop here? What's the matter with that space over there?

It's too tight.

Too tight?
You could land a jumbo-fucking-jet in there.

Leave him alone. He's a natural. Ain't you, Tyrone?

Of course I am.

A natural fucking idiot. Tyrone, what've you done?

Yeah, Tyrone, what have you done?

Look, you hassle me, you see what happens.

It's all right. No, don't move it now.
People'll see the damage. Why'd you do that?

I didn't see it.

It's a four-ton truck. It's not like it's a packet of fucking peanuts.

It was at a funny angle.

It's behind you, Tyrone.
Whenever you reverse, things come from behind you.

Control that dog as well.

Get that dog off him. - Get it off me.

Give me that squeaky toy. It shut him up last time.

Don't snatch.

He can't swallow the whole ball.

Yeah.


Thursday, 22 June 2017

cold forgiveness

Albrecht Dürer - Praying Hands, 1508
Source : Wikipedia

I ask for forgiveness to everyone reading this. Happy Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Batin.

For this year's Raya, my wife and I will be travelling south.

Wish you guys luck and happiness.


Yeah, I want to travel south this year
Won't prevent safe passage here

Why you act crazy
Not an act maybe
So close a lady
Shifty eyes shady

Tears that soak a callous heart

Why you act frightened?
I am enlightened
Your weakness builds me
So someday you'll see

I stay away

Why you act crazy
Not an act maybe
So close a lady
Shifty eyes shady

I stay away

Sunday, 18 June 2017

fire woods


William Simpson - Charge of the Light Brigade,1895
Source : Wikipedia

Malaysia 1MDB


First of all, I'm not pro or against any political parties, neither against or pro to those in power in Malaysia now.



The US Department of Justice made a second press statement on 15 June 2017.

Now, at that time, there were few comedic political issues which I think, were caused by the Malaysian government politician themselves, shooting themselves in the foot....Felda Global Ventures spat between Isa Samad and his appointed CEO, and the fiasco between Nazri Aziz with the ministers from Sarawak.

But what I see, Malaysia Today (a pro-Government blog) made more blog entry about US DOJ issue more than those 2 issues. And my intuition (hati kecil in Malay language) made me question, why with all these defensive measures, if it wasn't true?

If the issue of 1MDB is like what the pro-Government wants us to believe, ie. US DOJ is just doing an investigation based on an allegation which is still not conclusive,

then their Media advisers and pro-Government guys will just "play down" the issue. But instead, I think, their defence only heightens the exposure.

Maybe they want to defend, but in the same they want to indirectly ask those who are involved to "come clean".

That's what I think after reading all the news, entries, and the slots at TV3 Buletin Utama. If it was "nothing", then too much hype over "nothing" might cause citizens like me to wonder "why?".

And at this moment, I do pity RPK and his daughter Sara, and all those people of the so-called clever Boffin Boys, because they did their best, but in the end, the politicians they supported, keep shitting in their pants, and these Boffin Boys had to clean their mess.

What a pity it is, being that clever and that good, and to do so much good, but in the end, are as dispensible as fire woods.


Islamic posting in FB 

I was sickened to the core when I read the following in Facebook.

"Ustaz Sampah, bagi kuliah pun macam sampah. Fitnah dah jadi benda yg disukai. Baik dia bagi pencerahan pd orang hadir tu bab Hudud, ruu35 sebab ramai lagi yang masih kabur atau tak tahu especially Hudud"

The comment from someone who criticised someone about religion stuff., because the latter criticised someone from Islamic political party who commented on religious stuff.

These things happen, I think, because of politics.

But the fire between those who are knowledgable about Islam. usually are made more rapid and wide by those "fire woods", aka, the supporters.

And then they wonder why people like me sometimes couldn't see the beauty of Islam. The beauty is sometimes obscured by the fires made more glittering and more hotness by these fire woods.

These fire woods thought they are doing something good. 

But I think, in the end, everybody is at loss.

Yet the fire rages.

Richard Caton Woodville, Jr - Charge of the Light Brigade,1894
Source : Wikipedia



This song was written based on the "Charge of The Light Brigade" of the British light cavalry led by against Russian forces during the Battle of Balaclava on 25 October 1854. The assault ended with very high British casualties and no decisive gains.

You'll take my life but I'll take yours too
You'll fire your musket but I'll run you through
So when you're waiting for the next attack
You'd better stand there's no turning back.

The Bugle sounds and the charge begins
But on this battlefield no one wins
The smell of acrid smoke and horses breath
As I plunge on into certain death.

The horse he sweats with fear we break to run
The mighty roar of the Russian guns
And as we race towards the human wall
The screams of pain as my comrades fall.

We hurdle bodies that lay on the ground
And the Russians fire another round
We get so near yet so far away
We won't live to fight another day.

We get so close near enough to fight
When a Russian gets me in his sights
He pulls the trigger and I feel the blow
A burst of rounds take my horse below.

And as I lay there gazing at the sky
My body's numb and my throat is dry
And as I lay forgotten and alone
Without a tear I draw my parting groan.


Below is the famous poem by Lord Alfred Tennyson about the Charge of the Light Brigade
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems-and-poets/poems/detail/45319


Half a league, half a league, 
Half a league onward, 
All in the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 
“Forward, the Light Brigade! 
Charge for the guns!” he said. 
Into the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 

II 

“Forward, the Light Brigade!” 
Was there a man dismayed? 
Not though the soldier knew 
Someone had blundered. 
Theirs not to make reply, 
Theirs not to reason why, 
Theirs but to do and die. 
Into the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 

III 
Cannon to right of them, 
Cannon to left of them, 
Cannon in front of them 
Volleyed and thundered; 
Stormed at with shot and shell, 
Boldly they rode and well, 
Into the jaws of Death, 
Into the mouth of hell 
Rode the six hundred. 

IV 
Flashed all their sabres bare, 
Flashed as they turned in air 
Sabring the gunners there, 
Charging an army, while 
All the world wondered. 
Plunged in the battery-smoke 
Right through the line they broke; 
Cossack and Russian 
Reeled from the sabre stroke 
Shattered and sundered. 
Then they rode back, but not 
Not the six hundred. 

Cannon to right of them, 
Cannon to left of them, 
Cannon behind them 
Volleyed and thundered; 
Stormed at with shot and shell, 
While horse and hero fell. 
They that had fought so well 
Came through the jaws of Death, 
Back from the mouth of hell, 
All that was left of them, 
Left of six hundred. 


VI 
When can their glory fade? 
O the wild charge they made! 
All the world wondered. 
Honour the charge they made! 
Honour the Light Brigade, 
Noble six hundred!

Richard Caton Woodville, Jr - Charge of the Light Brigade,1894
Source : Wikipedia