Thursday, 5 December 2013


and so this week i spend some time in the hospital.

there are many things happening in Malaysia, increasing electric tariffs, a 13-year old who were raped, married off then divorced, the killing of 3 sisters at Kedah.

There's no need for me to talk of these, because it is obvious. It is sickening. You and other Malaysian felt it, and so I do not have to echo the voices of dissent.

Then, there's the recent stupidity of un-needed comments by Muslims in Malaysia about the death of Paul Walker, about the RIP thing.

One thing. We ourselves ain't sure whether we will die in peace or not, whether we ourselves are saved by His Grace or not when you die, so why be bothered so much about other's death?

With corruption and malpractices so rampant in Malaysia, are you guys feel safe enough to say Rest In Purgatory to the departed Paul Walker?

I promise you, when you are dying, or at least sick like me, a good wishing from anyone regardless of religion is pleasing to your ears.

In life, don't curse dead people. It's stupid. You can't ask for forgiveness, and even if it's truly bad, it doesn't affect you as the one is already departed. So why dirty your mouth?


When you stand in the critical line between life and death, what do you think at that present time?

You think of the important things. You won't bother with small things anymore.

Yesterday, as I got IV Drip and lay sickening, I received a phone call.


One year ago, 11 December 2012, I resigned from my job, then start wondering what to do next.

Friends, honest ones, all shared this view with me.

"Firdaus Mike, you can afford to resign because you do not have commitment like us".

Those friends, were all married, some with kids. They did their job not because they truly liked it but because they had to.

They had to buy a car not because they wanted, but because driving motorcycle with kids is dangerous.

Houses are painfully expensive.

But, everyone had to go on living. Go on. Stop for a while and go on.

And so I joined back the construction line this year with the same spirit.

I had to go on.

I need to build a certain foundation for my future, at least if I'm old or sick I do not have to beg.

It's not about being materialistic or shit. It's about being practical in life.

You can live your life as comfy as you want, without headaches, as stress-free as you wish, but I promise you, life is full of crisis.

You might have no problem but you might have no money.

You might have money but you might be alone by yourself.

You might have loved ones and families but you might not have the time.

The Malays always think that thinking about money is materialistic and irreligious, yet it is mostly the Malays that is found begging.

You know what everyone work for? Big house, big cars, etc? Materialistic?

If you think that is the answer, I'd tell you, you are immature.

People work for security. Security so they will be safe from begging when shit happens in their life.

People build financial success not to become proud, but to ensure when they are old, at least their financial investment can pay them back.

For instance, Chinese people buy lots of houses so that they can rent them out.

So, by the time they stopped working, fall into sickness or any kind of shit that happens, the monthly rent can be used to pay for food and bills.

If you work yourself hard not for this, I would say that you are in financial trouble. You would not have the sense to save or make any financial investment.

If you do not have this sense, you will spend money and credit cards to compete with others. That is suicidal.

When shit hits the fan, you have nothing to fall back into.


Now, when you are like me, lay sickening in the bed, would you care about small things?

Blogging is free. But if I'm too pre-occupied with this blogging thing that I worry about other people's post or comments, isn't it better to just disconnect? Why the hell should I worry so much on things that doesn't pay my bills?

And, blogging is free for everyone, and everyone has every right to post whatever they want on their blog.

For instance, one famous lady blogger might post about her going-out to a certain restaurant.

That is her right and if you don't like it, go to other page or just disconnect.

To question her motive and to think that she is showing off to the world she can afford to eat in a fancy place, is something quite childish.

What does it have anything to do with you that you are too bothered? Why too bothered about small things?


And so I paid the price yesterday for bothering other people's life so much.

I think of that person as a friend, and so I was concerned about that fella's not getting a job somewhere, while doing a part time.

I knew this fella is financially ok, but I know this fella can go further.

But I forgot. Friends are people, sometimes they agree sometimes they are not. Sometimes they felt your concern is too intrusive.

And their life is their life, not mine.

And so that friend of mine called me to state dissatisfaction on my concern over the phone yesterday while I was IV dripped with medications.

That friend is still a friend, but I did wish that time, that I could just disconnect the telephone line.

Sorry friend hehe.