Sunday, 18 October 2015


I remembered on 2013 when I tendered my resignation from a project abroad and came back to Malaysia quite broken.

I didn’t start work until September 2014, and it was around those period when I started this Tumblr and Blog.

I learned about my family crisis, the divorce and the conflicts, which somehow unsettled up to this day, but I learned the truth during those period.

During the same period, I ended a relationship with special someone also.

I find solace, in reading books and re-learning things, especially mathematics.

I remembered then learning about Godel’s Incompleteness Theorem..asking people here and there how to understand what Godel try to convey.

I just find the solitude in learning simply because of this one factor.

In mathematics, there is simply logic and truth..the idea of value and logic, relieves the pain of feeling emotional.

Mathematics, physics, are somehow mechanical in nature, and in its honesty, somehow made me feel better about life.

Its clockwise precision doesn’t betrays. It is honest as it is. Unlike people.

Then there’s one thing about these mechanical knowledge that made me more open-minded, I will share you my secret.

Everybody saw about the mundane things, but there will always be someone who looks at it differently, in a different view. And that’s when improvement of knowledge happened.

For example, people knew about electric from the 1500.

But it was Benjamin Franklin, who is a businessman, who named the term “positive” and “negative” to the electrical charge.

To him, Electrical charge can be viewed in credit and debit, like in accountancy, and in nature, the charges will flow to cancel out and balance each other.

Everybody saw things falling down.

But it was Newton who viewed it different, why the apples fall down but not the moon?

Because moon has a velocity. Without Earth's gravity, the Moon will move in a straight line with its velocity.

Due to gravity, or the pulling motion towards the center of the Earth, the Moon moves elliptical to the Earth.

Hence the Newton's First Law of Motion :
 Every body persists in its state of being at rest or of moving uniformly straight forward, except insofar as it is compelled to change its state by force impressed.

Therefore, if I couldn't understand something, I have to view it differently.

If some people understand it but I don't, then I have to learn to view it from the perspective of the people which understood it.

Don't simply reject. Try to view it.

But it's normal for people to reject it outright as we people, have finite time in our life.

The shortness of our space and time sometimes forced us to only process our diminutive experience rather than learning new ones.

I write this, because I'm sickened by what's happening in my life and generally what's happening in Malaysia.

The economic power is going down,
standard of living going down,
crime rates increased as people are more oppressed to make life better.
Politics lost its good nature.

Only in reading and viewing this "academic" materials, I felt honest for life.

There's no lie in maths.

Its clockwork precision is brutally honest.